So first thing is first I supposed. My name is Golden. I am 25, just turned 25 actually and for some reason the goals in my life had changed allot. When you're young you think about how you want to be rich and famous or help people or animals or be a ninja (yes a ninjas). But as you get older those things change and with me they changed day to day until I figured out that I had to be responsible. Not just for myself but for my job, my car, my finances, everything. Why don't they give you a book as soon as you shoot out of the womb that says "Hey, not so fast...you're going to screw up, read this"?
To make a long story short a few days after my birthday I reevaluated allot of things in my life. People, my job, my goals, my sanity. And none of them really made me want to grow up. I don't want to be an adult; I don't want to be responsible! But you have to be and in part of that you have to want to have a happy life. That was the kicker for me I sat back and thought wow you're a happy person and after this life reflection I realized, no dude, you're not.
So I decided when I got back from Vacation some changes were going to be made.
1. Move off property (I am an apt mgr. I lived on prop. Bad idea)
2. Love your job (After moving, I love it even more)
3. See your family (I need to see them more)
4. Love yourself (this is the hardest one)
My list wasn't a long one and that’s because most of the problem was with me. So I talked to a good friend of mine and shared some very deep and emotional feelings. The next day I ran a mile at the gym and forgot how wonderful that feeling was. So I called her up and said “dude, this is it. It is all or nothing". I have done this time and time again. Shoot I have had the membership for year and have used it probably 3 months. So I put myself a schedule together and have stuck to it.
Yesterday was the best I have felt in ages. I worked my ass off and I feel like mush today but I know it needs to be done. I want to be healthy and happy. I want to be able to play with my children and be active in their lives when that time comes not some bump on a log.
So I jumped in with both feet again, only this time the feeling is so much more. I can't shake it; I can't walk away from it. It has to be done. There are no more excuses. And to tell you the truth I can't be more scared. This is crazy; I am so excited but so afraid of the outcome. Like what if this really changes my life. How amazing would that be? How much better my attitude would be, my confidence, my dependability, my humbleness. It’s the best feeling I have had in a long time and I can't want to see the changes that I make for the better.
To make a long story short a few days after my birthday I reevaluated allot of things in my life. People, my job, my goals, my sanity. And none of them really made me want to grow up. I don't want to be an adult; I don't want to be responsible! But you have to be and in part of that you have to want to have a happy life. That was the kicker for me I sat back and thought wow you're a happy person and after this life reflection I realized, no dude, you're not.
So I decided when I got back from Vacation some changes were going to be made.
1. Move off property (I am an apt mgr. I lived on prop. Bad idea)
2. Love your job (After moving, I love it even more)
3. See your family (I need to see them more)
4. Love yourself (this is the hardest one)
My list wasn't a long one and that’s because most of the problem was with me. So I talked to a good friend of mine and shared some very deep and emotional feelings. The next day I ran a mile at the gym and forgot how wonderful that feeling was. So I called her up and said “dude, this is it. It is all or nothing". I have done this time and time again. Shoot I have had the membership for year and have used it probably 3 months. So I put myself a schedule together and have stuck to it.
Yesterday was the best I have felt in ages. I worked my ass off and I feel like mush today but I know it needs to be done. I want to be healthy and happy. I want to be able to play with my children and be active in their lives when that time comes not some bump on a log.
So I jumped in with both feet again, only this time the feeling is so much more. I can't shake it; I can't walk away from it. It has to be done. There are no more excuses. And to tell you the truth I can't be more scared. This is crazy; I am so excited but so afraid of the outcome. Like what if this really changes my life. How amazing would that be? How much better my attitude would be, my confidence, my dependability, my humbleness. It’s the best feeling I have had in a long time and I can't want to see the changes that I make for the better.
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